Antonia Rolls A Good Death exhibition
My friend Nanette was talking to me about a friend who’s dying. She posed a couple of interesting questions I thought it worth sharing with you (with her permission of course).
“Our friend is in a hospice, heavily drugged so not fully with it. As often happens he has gone downhill very rapidly (he has cancer).
“His wife thought that he only had hours left to live and let his close circle of friends know. She invited us to send a text that she’d read out to him if we wanted to pass on a message.
“Since it sounded like his end was imminent I quickly pulled together some things that I had been reflecting on for a while and sent them over.
“My partner is godfather to their children and he didn’t want to say his farewells in a text. He was able to go into the hospice for a face to face farewell.
“It made me wonder, when push comes to shove, is any message better than none?
“When I think about my friend, I think ‘pavlova’. He makes the best pavlova in the world. I’ll miss it. No other pavlova will match his. Any time in the future when I do have pavlova, I’ll think of him.
“So bizarrely, my text said: “NO ONE makes pavlova like you. Absolutely top!” (OK I did say a few other heartfelt things too.)
“I wondered… can a farewell come across as trivial? And aside from the person dying, who else might find a farewell message meaningful -close family and friends.”
Having just witnessed the power of a condolence book being created by workmates for a lost soul, I can definitely bear witness to the importance of sharing.
So, inspired by this, we’re working on it. Up ahead, with other changes we’re making, we’ll make it possible to share more on through a Final Fling account… sharing ideas, inspiration, messages.
If you have ideas for Fling let us know. Contact us any time. Or fill in our short survey if you use Final Fling already.
For one amazing approach to saying Goodbye, see Jane and Jimmy’s site to son Josh: Beyond Goodbye.
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